
A story does not have to contain dialogue, nor does any character need to speak, but if you intend to have characters interact through speech, then you will need good dialogue.
In this chapter, we will explore the art of creating natural dialogue, creating internal monologues, static versus descriptive dialogue, using ellipses, using em dashes, stammering, using italics for emphasis, shouting, and improper grammar.
14a: Creating Natural Dialogue:
Dialogue in real life isn’t pretty. There are lots of pauses, repeated words and phrases, and interjections that don’t make much literary sense on the page.
Here’s an example of real-life dialogue:
“So we went to the park, you know,” chuckled Brian, “…uhhh…and we…we…uhhh…we saw this guy…he was walking a dog—I…I think it was a beagle—and…uhhh…this guy…this guy was wearing the…the—this is so funny—the ugliest sweater, you know, and…ha, ha, ha…you wouldn’t believe it!”
Ten minutes of reading something like that would likely cause you to throw the reading material in question in the trash. We understand real-life dialogue because we’re so used to hearing it, but putting raw speech directly into the written word doesn’t work. We want a natural feel to our written dialogue, but what we don’t want is actual spoken reality.
14a1: Natural Dialogue:
In order to get the feel of real-life dialogue, we need to emulate it only to the point where it feels natural rather than realistic. In other words, only put in breaks in speech, repeated words, and interjections when they give the dialogue a natural feel or create emphasis. You have to tone it down.
Here is an example of natural dialogue, using the example from before, only rewritten for that natural feel rather than direct-to-page real life:
“So we went to the park, you know,” chuckled Brian, “and we…we…uhhh…we saw this guy walking a dog—I think it was a beagle—and this guy was wearing the ugliest sweater. It was so funny, you wouldn’t believe it!”
As you can see from the example above, you want to tone down real-life dialogue to the point where it only simulates real life. Brian’s speech in this example reflects his speech patterns and, therefore, gives him some semblance of personality just by how he talks.
14a2: Literary Dialogue:
Of course, you could just write your characters using literary dialogue, but this can come off sounding fake and ridiculous. However, if done right, the dialogue will sound fine, though it may not simulate real life. In fact, most authors use literary dialogue, expecting the reader to understand emphasis and personality through implied context.
Here is an example of literary dialogue done correctly, using the example from above:
“So we went to the park,” chuckled Brian, “and we saw this guy walking a beagle. This guy was wearing the ugliest sweater. It was so funny, you wouldn’t believe it!”
Now here’s the same story, only poorly written in literary dialogue:
“We went to the park,” chuckled Brian. “There was a guy walking a beagle. This guy had the ugliest sweater. It was funny!”
The short and choppy way Brian speaks here may actually be part of his personality in this bit of speech, if that’s what you’re going for, but if this is the way all of your characters sound, then good grief! He sounds like a robot, and so will all of your other characters.
As you can see, we get the gist of what Brian is trying to say through good literary dialogue, though we may not get that real-life, natural feel from his story about the man in the park. How you wish to write your dialogue, however, is up to you. Writing in a literary format is easier than attempting natural dialogue, but the effect should be equal when relaying information to your readers.
14a3: Creating Differences in Character Dialogue:
Mentioning literary dialogue brings us back around to natural dialogue, and one very good way to make speech sound natural, regardless of whether you use natural or literary dialogue, is to create differences in the way characters speak. This reflects both personality and mood.
Here are three examples of character differences in speech using literary dialogue.
Let’s start with one we’ve already used:
“So we went to the park,” chuckled Brian, “and we saw this guy walking a beagle. This guy was wearing the ugliest sweater. It was so funny, you wouldn’t believe it!”
You’ll notice that this is the previous example of good literary dialogue. In this example, Brian uses the words “so” and “went,” he repeats the word “guy,” and he uses the word “funny” for the end emphasis of his story. All of this makes him sound a little rough around the edges, like a working-man Brian.
Now let’s go for something a little different:
“We ended up driving to the park,” chuckled Brian. “It hadn’t been two minutes before we saw a man walking a beagle, but that’s not the funny part. This guy had on the ugliest sweater I have ever seen in my life. It was hilarious!”
This version of Brian sounds a little more educated than the previous Brian. He puts more detail into his speech and drops the “so” and “went,” replacing them with more expressive forms. Though he uses the words “funny” and “guy,” he also uses “hilarious” and “man,” and he uses the word “hilarious” to emphasize the end of his story.
Now let’s go way off the beaten path:
“I say, my good man!” chuckled Brian. “You would never, ever believe our story. We had decided to take a stroll in the park, and there was a chap there walking his beagle, but this fellow was bedecked in the most hideous eyesore of a cardigan! It was such a heinous affront to the eyes, it was positively hysterical!”
This Brian sounds like he walked straight out of a British comedy about the upper crust experiencing the culture shock of everyday people. The point of this example, however, is to show you that differences in how characters speak identify their personalities to your readers. It makes your dialogue sound more natural without sounding like real life.
The same can be done with natural dialogue, of course.
Let’s use the three examples from above, only with natural dialogue rather than literary dialogue:
“So we went to the park, you know,” chuckled Brian, “and we…we…uhhh…we saw this guy walking a dog—I think it was a beagle—and this guy was wearing the ugliest sweater. It was so funny, you wouldn’t believe it!”
This is rough-around-the-edges Brian.
Now let’s move on to educated Brian:
“We ended up driving to the park,” chuckled Brian. “It…It hadn’t been two minutes before—Oh, my God—before we saw a man walking a beagle, but…but that’s not the funny part. This guy had on the ugliest sweater I have ever seen in my life!…Oh, my God, it was hilarious!”
Now let’s give the example of stereotypical upper-crust British Brian:
“I say, my good man!” chuckled Brian. “You would never, ever believe our story. We had decided to take a stroll in the park, you see, but…but—Oh, this is a rib-tickler—this old chap was taking his beagle for a walk, and…and—excuse my humor, my good man—and he was bedecked in the most hideous eyesore of a cardigan! It was such a heinous affront to the eyes, it was positively hysterical!”
Your characters should all sound slightly different. They may all have similar speech patterns if they know each other well or live in the same area or neighborhood, but every unique character should sound at least a little different. Of course, they don’t have to sound as different as stereotypical upper-crust British Brian. He was just an example of how radically different spoken dialogue can sound between characters.
You can also switch between natural dialogue and literary dialogue to suit your tastes. This can spotlight a character’s mood or presence when indicated.
Last but not least, read your dialogue out loud if you’re unsure of how it sounds in your head. Remember an easy rule of thumb: If no one in real life talks like that, they probably won’t talk like that in your story either, not unless they’re eccentric or have a serious mental disorder.
14b: Creating Internal Monologues:
Dialogue is not only what characters say to each other. It can also include what characters say to themselves. When your characters think, only they can hear themselves, but your readers, being outside observers, should be able to hear them as well. In this section, we’ll go over short thoughts, internal monologues, and implied thoughts.
14b1: Short Thoughts:
You’ve probably been taught to write down thoughts in this way, but this particular method is only good for short thoughts. Do not use this method for internal monologues. Internal monologues are statements or conversations that appear in a character’s head, and they are separate from the body of any paragraph containing anything else. In other words, they are their own paragraphs.
For short thoughts, we put the thought in italics and connect it to the sentence, but we don’t put it in quotation marks.
Here are a few examples of short thoughts:
“I don’t need your pity,” said Marcus as he thought, she’s never going to let this go. “Just let me do it myself.”
“Give me last year’s taxes, not the taxes from two years ago,” said Mary as she thought, she is so stupid.
“I don’t have the answer,” he said as he thought, I most certainly do.
Using short thoughts in sentences is usually only acceptable if you don’t plan on having internal monologues in your short story, novel, or novella. It’s best not to mix both methods, and when using the short-thought method, you should use it sparingly. It can be jarring and can interrupt the reader’s own thought process.
14b2: Internal Monologues:
This method is used when you wish to relay a character’s thoughts on a regular basis. For an internal monologue, the thought is in its own paragraph and is surrounded by quotation marks, just like regular dialogue. However, unlike regular dialogue, the thought itself is in italics, though the dialogue tag or interjecting description is not.
Here are some examples of internal monologues:
“I don’t like this,” thought Joey. “This whole thing smells like a trap.”
“I really need to have a discussion with Anthony,” thought Maria. “I feel like I’m failing as a mother. My son should have more respect for others. I know I didn’t raise a thug.”
“They must be hiding behind that island,” pondered Jacob. “Our ships have scouted the surrounding area, and…nothing. They can’t have vanished into thin air! I do know that if I catch that blasted pirate…I won’t be merciful.”
With internal monologues, characters can have entire conversations with themselves inside their own heads. As I stated before, internal monologues are best used when you plan on showing your characters’ thoughts on a regular basis.
14b3: Implied Thoughts:
If you don’t want any hassle about writing down thoughts, implied thoughts are the way to go, though they work differently depending upon what point of view you’re writing in.
For the third-person points of view, whether limited or omniscient, a character’s thoughts are described rather than written as thoughts:
“So we’re on for lunch at noon, then?” asked Sarah. “We can go over the project before heading to the library.”
“Uhhh, sure, I guess,” replied Dane in a sheepish tone.
“Okay,” smiled Sarah. “Noon it is, then. I’ll meet you in front of the Union Cafeteria.”
But Dane did not need this.
He knew what she wanted, and it had nothing to do with the project, but he could not just say no. He did not want to hurt her feelings, because enough hurt had gone around with Mariah, and he did not think he could stand to witness another devastated expression upon a lover’s face. Still, he did not want to give Sarah the wrong idea, though he could not think of a way offhand to express this.
The thoughts in question are described within the paragraph following the dialogue between Dane and Sarah. The reader can clearly tell what Dane is thinking, even though his thoughts weren’t written down.
Now let’s go over the same conversation, but we’ll look at it from a first-person point of view:
“So we’re on for lunch at noon, then?” asked Sarah. “We can go over the project before heading to the library.”
“Uhhh, sure, I guess,” I sheepishly replied.
“Okay,” smiled Sarah. “Noon it is, then. I’ll meet you in front of the Union Cafeteria.”
Yeah, I didn’t need this.
Oh, I knew what she wanted, and it had nothing to do with the project, but I couldn’t just say no. I didn’t want to hurt her feelings, because enough hurt had gone around with Mariah, and I just couldn’t stand to witness another devastated expression like that. Still, I didn’t want to give Sarah the wrong idea, but I had no clue how I was going to get out of this one.
The thoughts in question are simply implied in separate paragraphs without italics or quotation marks, just like in third-person POV. The difference is in the delivery, as first-person POV always relays a more personal feel to the reader about your character.
Implied thoughts work best from a first-person point of view, and if you’re going to write in first person, you should only use implied thoughts. First-person POV is so personal in perspective that your character’s thoughts should be relayed as an aside, like an actor talking to the audience outside of the main body of the script.
Internal monologues should only be used when writing in one of the third-person points of view, but they can also be mixed with implied thoughts, and they should be. The internal monologue is best used to relay a focused thought or mental conversation to the reader while you imply everything else.
14c: Static versus Descriptive Dialogue:
Static dialogue is the basis of most written works, but it can come off sounding repetitive, and it doesn’t display mood within speech. Descriptive dialogue is never repetitive and is great for displaying mood…if you can pull it off.
In this section, we will go over static dialogue, descriptive dialogue, facial expressions, and descriptions of motion.
14c1: Static Dialogue:
Static dialogue is your basic he said, she said, it said, they said. There’s nothing else to it. This is handy for new writers or writers who don’t want to learn descriptive dialogue. Also, this method won’t anger your creative writing teacher.
Here are some examples of static dialogue:
“I need some help with this kitchen,” said Andrea. “I can only clean so much.”
“Don’t give me that look,” he said. “I actually did like the movie.”
“Call now and win tickets to this summer’s Rock Out Festival,” said the announcer. “The thirty-first caller wins two tickets to the much-anticipated R.O.F.!”
The gist of static dialogue is in the use of the word “said.” It’s your basic go-to when stating anything someone…err…says. It’s not fancy, but it gets the job done. However, this type of dialogue does not convey mood, though you won’t spectacularly fail with it if you do it wrong.
14c2: Descriptive Dialogue:
Descriptive dialogue is just like it sounds: descriptive. You use other words in place of the word “said,” though you will still use the word “said” quite often.
Here are some examples of descriptive dialogue:
“I don’t care what they want!” yelled Richard.
“Have a heart, Mick,” whined Connie. “I only need a twenty, and then I’ll pay you back.”
“I think you look gorgeous,” smiled William. “Don’t be so hard on yourself.”
Using descriptive dialogue displays mood and intent to the reader. However, don’t overdo it! You can really drive away your readers by trying too hard. This is why we sprinkle in the word “said” when a statement is just that: a statement. When using descriptive dialogue, you’ll still use static dialogue a lot just to mix it up.
Also, you may run into what I call “The Creative Writing Teacher Wall.” You’ll find people who insist that you only use static dialogue. This type of stubborn thinking comes from the erroneous belief that the reader will automatically pick up intent. In real life, we can pick up intent and mood by the tone of someone’s voice, the expression on their face, and the mannerisms they present. This doesn’t work with the written word without description.
In cases like these, you should always write the way you wish to write. Don’t let anyone else mess with your style. After all, if you don’t quite have a handle on descriptive dialogue but you still want to use it, it just takes practice to get it right. When in doubt, read it out loud to yourself. If it comes off as hokey, just change it. You can always rely on the word “said” if it doesn’t sound right.
14c3: A Warning About Expressive Dialogue Tags:
Your literary professor, your book agent, or a traditional publishing employee will tell you this: Don’t use descriptive dialogue tags. They’ll call these tags “expressive dialogue tags,” but this is incorrect. An actual expressive dialogue tag shows a character’s expression or action alongside the dialogue, thereby changing the tone or meaning of what is said.
Here is our first example:
“Have a nice day,” she said.
With this static, literary dialogue tag, “said,” we have to imply how the character said, “Have a nice day.”
Now let’s look at these two examples:
“Have a nice day,” she smiled.
“Have a nice day,” she frowned.
With these two examples, we can see expressive dialogue tags. Both tags give a very different tone and meaning to the sentence. With both dialogue sentences, we can see that the examples above are short for:
“Have a nice day,” she said with a smile.
“Have a nice day,” she said with a frown.
Now, a literary elite will call an actual expressive dialogue tag an error. This is untrue. This is only an error for them. My favorite line from one of these people is:
“You can’t wink speech.”
Of course you can’t wink speech. The dialogue has already been established with the quotation marks themselves. The expressive dialogue tag is just delivering an expression that conveys mood.
In fact, the only thing dialogue needs is an indicator as to who said what:
“Have a nice day.” —Sarah
“You too.” —Dave
In the examples above, we know who said what because their names are listed. Oh, wait…you can’t em dash speech. I forgot.
So what does all of this mean? It means if you’re going through a traditional publishing company, you’ll have to bend to their will. If you’re an indie writer like me, you don’t have to follow these obnoxious gatekeepers. You can be as creative as you want with any dialogue you write.
14c4: Facial Expressions and Descriptions of Motion:
You’ll use facial expressions and descriptions of motion, meaning expressive dialogue tags and action beats, with both static and descriptive dialogue, which is why this section is listed last. Facial expressions and descriptions of motion help solidify intent, establish a mood, or portray a quirk if necessary.
Here are some examples of facial expressions and descriptions of motion:
“Don’t go there,” he frowned as he shook his head. “I’m not in the mood.”
“There it is,” she said as she pointed toward Darcy’s misplaced phone. “Found it.”
“I had no idea you knew how to do that,” said Donald, his eyes widening.
“All right!” yelled the coach as he clapped his hands. “Get it together, guys! I want to see defense!”
“That’s the right way to do it,” nodded Ms. Emma.
Mixing facial expressions and descriptions of motion with either static or descriptive dialogue goes a long way in immersing your readers in your story. It’s not difficult to detail what a character is doing during dialogue, and you don’t have to write a separate paragraph to do so.
14d: Using Ellipses:
Any of those annoying grammarians will tell you that the ellipsis, those three dots, is for implying words left unsaid or omitting words from a sentence. It is also used for trailing off a sentence. However, we are writing commercial genre fiction, and genre fiction is a different art altogether from classic literature, so in order to write natural speech or simply indicate a pause in a sentence, we will use ellipses to do just that.
In this section, we will go over using ellipses to emulate natural speech, using ellipses to indicate a longer pause in a sentence, and using ellipses to indicate stammering.
14d1: Using Ellipses to Emulate Natural Speech:
Natural dialogue will often have pauses in speech where the speaker stops before continuing with their sentence.
Here are some examples:
“I don’t have the money,” said Bob. “It’s just…It’s just that…I haven’t been able to find work.”
“I just…I just had no idea,” said Sheila. “I really didn’t.”
“Maybe you can try out for the team,” shrugged Will. “You can’t…You just can’t give up before you’ve even started.”
14d2: Using Ellipses to Indicate a Longer Pause in a Sentence:
We can use ellipses to indicate long pauses in a sentence for dramatic effect. I wouldn’t overuse this, though. Your writing can come off as hokey and hammy if you overuse this technique.
Here are some examples of this use of ellipses:
She knew what she had to do, and she was going to do it…one way or another.
“If I had a dollar for every mistake I’ve made on this project…I’d have one dollar,” said Serena. “That mistake was hiring you. Get back to work!”
Given time, he would make his way back to the castle…and then he would have his revenge.
14d3: Using Ellipses to Indicate Stammering:
We can use ellipses to repeat words or parts of words to indicate stammering. Note that this isn’t a common way to indicate stammering. I use it, but that doesn’t mean you have to.
Here are some examples:
“I…I…I didn’t know we had a low tire!” stammered Erica.
“Wh…What was that!” asked Brent in excitement. “Did you see that!”
“There w…wasn’t anything I could do about it, sir!” she choked out.
If you so choose, you can use hyphens (-) instead of ellipses in order to indicate stammering. There are no hard and fast rules on this, and different authors have used one or the other to indicate stammering.
14e: Using Em Dashes:
Em dashes (—) should be used when writing interruptions in speech or when indicating a break in the main idea of a sentence.
14e1: What to Do with Interruptions in Speech:
When speech is interrupted, we don’t use ellipses (…); we use the em dash (—) instead. I have made the mistake of using ellipses for interruptions many, many times, but the em dash is the proper way to indicate an interruption, and it just looks cool.
Here are some examples of using an em dash for interruptions:
“You need to bring—” he started to say.
“Don’t give me th—” started Karin, but she was cut short.
“It was the best of times, it was the worst of—” he began, but a loud clatter at the back of the classroom interrupted his lesson.
14e2: Using Em Dashes to Indicate a Break in the Main Idea of a Sentence:
Whenever you have a break in the main idea of a sentence, whether that sentence is dialogue or not, we use the em dash (—).
Here are some examples:
“I already know what to do—don’t patronize me—and I’m going to do it,” said Marel.
“When light reflects off snow—and it seems to be this way every February—people can be hospitalized by ‘snow blindness,’ a condition caused by extended exposure to reflected light from fallen snow…” the professor droned on.
“We hit the high ground—a mistake if there ever was one—and the enemy opened fire,” said William. “It was a massacre.”
14f: Using Hyphens to Indicate Stammering:
Like ellipses, hyphens can be used to repeat words or parts of words to indicate stammering.
We’ll use the same examples as before:
“I-I-I didn’t know we had a low tire!” stammered Erica.
“Wh-What was that!” asked Brent in excitement. “Did you see that!”
“There w-wasn’t anything I could do about it, sir!” she choked out.
As previously mentioned, there are no hard and fast rules on this, so you should just choose one method and stick with it.
14g: Using Italics for Emphasis:
Italics are often used to put emphasis on a word spoken in a different tone or with a different level of force. In this section, we’ll briefly go over using italics for emphasis and extending words for drawled speech.
14g1: Emphasis with Italics:
You may use italics on a single word or a small phrase in order to express speech emphasis when required. However, the main rule when using italics is: don’t overdo it.
Here are some examples of using italics for emphasis:
“You do not tell me what to do,” scowled Missy.
“That was definitely a mistake,” winced James as he held his knee.
“Holy Moley!” exclaimed Bobby. “How did you catch that ball!”
You can see from the examples above that emphasis has been put on certain words in order to express a change in mood or attitude with the speaker involved. However, as I said before, don’t overdo it.
When I first started writing professionally, I had people here and there tell me to never use italics, and I am one of those people who will immediately go out and do it just because you told me not to.
You’ll learn really quickly not to pour italics over everything like they’re going out of style. When you read back your own over-italicized work, you’ll find that it sounds annoying and disruptive. An occasional italicized word for emphasis is fine, but don’t get too slap-happy with it. I’ve made this mistake before, and it’s not fun to cringe every time you read your own work.
14g2: Extending Words for Drawled Speech:
You should italicize words that are extended in speech, such as words that are drawled out for emphasis. Extended words are a character quirk for the dialogue in question, but they should be used carefully and not overdone.
Here are a few examples of extended words:
“That is one biiiiig fish you caught, Barney,” nodded Willy.
“You’re using waaaay too much salt,” said Ellen with wide eyes.
“I love you thiiiiiiiiis much,” said Carl’s mom as she spread her arms wide.
The rule for extending words is the same as the rule for using italics for emphasis: don’t overdo it. When in doubt, use the old rule of thumb: read back your own work, and read it out loud. If it doesn’t sound right, fix it.
14h: Shouting:
You may put words into all capital letters when a character is shouting. This should be used sparingly, if at all. It represents shouting at the top of your lungs. It can be really annoying if used frequently, so be judicious about it. I mainly use this for artistic purposes. If someone is simply yelling, we typically just use an exclamation point for that.
Here are some examples of shouting:
“HEY!” she shouted. “You kids get out of the street!”
“I don’t CARE!” he shouted.
“INCOMING!” shouted Corporal Jones. “Take cover!”
14i: Improper Grammar:
This is not a long section. Why, you may ask? It’s because it’s not complicated.
The rule here is: use proper grammar when writing the main body of text. You may use improper grammar when writing dialogue.
In real life, people don’t always speak with proper grammar, but your brain has trained you to understand them anyway. So when writing dialogue, feel free to use improper grammar to portray a person as they really are. Just don’t overdo it.
Improper grammar in dialogue is one of the easiest ways to show age, education, region, social class, mood, confidence, nervousness, or personality without stopping the story to explain it.
Here are some examples of improper grammar in dialogue:
“I want cookie, Mommy,” said Liam. “I pick up toys. I want cookie now.”
(Liam is clearly a child who has not learned to put in words like “a,” “the,” and “my.” He has also made a tense error with the word “pick.”)
“We didn’t come down here to see no weird stuff,” said Dwight. “I ain’t saying I’m ungrateful or nothing, but I gotta business to run.”
(Dwight has a double negative in the first sentence. The “no” in the first sentence can be fixed by replacing it with “any.” “Ain’t” in the second sentence is not considered proper grammar, and it can also act as a double negative with the word “nothing.” The word “nothing” should be replaced with “anything.” The phrase “I gotta business to run” should be “I have a business to run.”)
“How much you want for that car?” asked Dottie. “I can right now lay down five grand.”
(Dottie left out the word “do” in the first sentence. She misplaced the words “right now” in the second sentence.)
“They were all disorganized, so the guys lined up the dinner plates,” said Hal. “That table was a mess.”
(Hal has an unclear pronoun reference with “They were all disorganized.” This could indicate either the “guys” or the “dinner plates” as being disorganized. Due to context in his second sentence, we can assume he meant the dinner plates.)
Most people speak with improper grammar, yet somehow we understand the meaning of this improper grammar. In reality, if you walked around all day long speaking in perfect grammar, you would come off as pretentious, egotistical, arrogant, and/or narcissistic. It would quickly alienate you from the rest of society. In other words, most people do not speak with perfect grammar outside of a professional setting, such as teaching a class, giving a speech, or relaying the news as a reporter.
14j: In Closing:
Many of the techniques I’ve listed above are frowned upon by the literary community, but hey, guess what? We’re not writing for the literary elite. We’re writing genre fiction, so feel free to use whatever techniques you see fit. Make your own art in the form of the written word, and don’t be intimidated by other people’s views on the matter.
As I’ve said many a time before, genre fiction is its own art. Dialogue is one of the most flexible tools you have as a writer, so use it in the way that best serves your story, your characters, and your readers.
You’re not writing for anyone but yourself and your own fans, so remember that.
The Quick and Easy Guide to Writing Genre Fiction Copyright 1st ed. © 2022 Matthew L. Marlott
TQ&EGtWGF: Chapter 14…Dialogue Copyright © 2026 bloodytwine.com Matthew L. Marlott
The image for Chapter 14 of TQ&EGtWGF was generated by artificial intelligence courtesy of OpenAI.
