15: Churpo Zurbeebo…Kaduka Hakka Fwappa Suuk…(Chapter Fifteen…Hanging ’round the South Quarter)
It was a little past noon.
Dulp had eaten an entire fried chicken, he had drunk a third of a bottle of Rote Neun, some of the Chief’s finest hooch, and he was currently relaxing and maxing on a soft patchwork blanket Lyga had given him many moons ago.
“Ah, this is the good life,” he smiled.
Life was indeed good for the moment, if only for the moment.
Of course, this was about to change, because Skippy had just entered his hutch, and the ugly little gob was excited as all get out, and that was never a good sign.
“Dulp!” cried Skippy in glowing, unmitigated enthusiasm.
“Wh…What?” stammered Dulp. “What is it now?”
There was no telling what this was. Couldn’t he just have one day off before he died in some horrible fashion, probably at the hands of his insane other half? Who needed orcs and zombies and skeletons and witches and sorceresses when Lyga was out there just waiting for him, waiting like a bear in the woods?
“We’ve got to go!” exclaimed Skippy.
“Go?” asked Dulp. “Go where?”
“We’re heading to the South Quarter!” replied the ugly little gob.
“Liiiiiiiike Heckens!” was Dulp’s immediate and well-justified reply.
This response was automatic. It was something ingrained in every sane gob, as self-preservation was a number-one priority when it came to gob instinct.
“Oh, get up and get moving!” urged Skippy. “I’m meeting Jenny in the South Quarter Square, and then we’re heading over to the library.”
“The library?” asked Dulp in growing disbelief. “The library? No one goes to the library, Skippy. Not even the bogos go to the library. The only two bogos that I know of who go to the library are Jenny Crazy Eyes and Plain Jane, and that’s it…
“Well, the old bogos go there, but that’s if they don’t have much to do. Sometimes, they take the little ones there for some kind of ‘story hour,’ but that’s it. I’m not two anymore, Skippy, and I don’t need a ‘story hour.’
“Plus, that crazy bogo, Jane, is there. She’s a real nutball, if you ask me. She spends too much time sniffing her books…and that’s beside the fact that she’s uglier than a wart on a doggo’s bumhole, a mangy doggo’s bumhole.”
“Seriously?” asked Skippy in obvious disbelief. “Jane is literally the hottest bogo in the village! If it weren’t for Jenny, I’d have already sewn my lips to Jane’s big beautiful—”
This was unbelievable. There was no way he could let Skippy finish that statement.
“Whoa, whoa, whoa,” protested Dulp as he waved both hands, palms out. “Are you all right? Did you hit your head?”
“I’m fine,” waved off Skippy. “Look, I know you think she’s ugly, but I don’t see it that way.”
“How could you not?” asked Dulp.
He simply couldn’t unsee the absolute ugly that was Plain Jane.
The ugly little gob that was Skippy rested his chin in his right hand as his strange blue eyes flitted back and forth in obvious visible thought.
“Hmmm…” said Skippy. “Well, I know why you think she’s ugly…so let me describe her in a different way that might change your mind.”
“Okaaaaaay…” said Dulp warily.
This was definitely going to have to be one Heckens of an explanation.
“I know you don’t like the way she looks,” said Skippy slowly and with great thought. “However…However, I’ve been on a quest, a quest to see who in Pingo, which bogo in Pingo, has the best bare bottom, and I believe…no, I know…that award goes to Plain Jane.”
Dulp shrugged.
“Yeeeeeaaaah…I think I can see that,” he said thoughtfully. “Yeeeaaaaah…I can see that. If you put a bag over her head, put her in some dim lantern light to cancel out our natural night vision, and if she was naked, bent over, and her backside up and out…yeeeeeeaaaah…I could go for that.”
Skippy clapped his hands together and pointed his index fingers straight down at Dulp, a huge grin on his face.
“I told you!” he said happily. “Why hasn’t any gob thought of this before!”
“You make a good point,” nodded Dulp.
Eh, he was buzzed on Rote Neun, so the thought of a Rush Time with Jane, under those very specific conditions, wasn’t so bad.
“Even so, I know what you’re trying to do, Skippy,” warned Dulp. “I know Jane’s situation is sad, and I know you solved Jenny’s loneliness, but Jane isn’t the same.
“Jenny’s loneliness was caused by fear due to the prophecy, but you, being a fearless badarse White Skull, solved that. You crushed that prophecy…but Jane’s just too darned ugly for any gob in Pingo to risk a Rush Time with her. That’s guaranteed to wither their dill and walnuts and make their family jewels fall off. No gob wants that.”
“But I don’t have a gob from Pingo in mind,” nodded Dulp. “You see, I have a cousin…whose name is Happinus…Happy, for short…and he’d be thrilled to hook up with Jane.”
What in the Heckens was wrong with the White Skulls? Were their standards that low?
“Wait, what?” asked Dulp in disbelief. “Is your cousin blind or something?”
“No, no…” said Skippy with a shake of his head. “You misunderstand…The White Skulls would absolutely take in Jane, because…uhhh…the Skulls are all about survival…Yeah, that sounds plausible…Ummm…Where was I?…Oh, yeah…The Skulls are all about survival, and they never let anything go to waste, so Jane would be more than welcome with one of them.”
Well…that did sound logical.
“Okay,” shrugged Dulp. “If the Skulls want to poach Jane from Pingo, I have no problem with that. Jane would probably jump over the moon, if that were the case. She’s never had a Rush Time, you know. Even Fat Mary has her beat on that.”
“I know, I know,” nodded Skippy. “That’s why we’re going down to the library with Jenny to have a talk with Jane. I discussed my plan with Jenny, and she and Old Matron Bogo dug out a magic orb that allows you to speak to others via long distances. It even has a translator enchanted in it. With a sketch I’ve drawn of my cousin, Happy, I think Jane will really want to talk to him.”
“Okay,” said Dulp with a wary nod. “Okay…Let me see this sketch first.”
Skippy dug out his sketchbook, flipped it open, and revealed his charcoal sketch of his cousin, “Happy.”
Dulp had to shake his head at the ugliness of this gob. This poor bastage was just as ugly as Skippy, and in fact, the family resemblance was uncanny.
Of course, the Great Gob hadn’t exactly been kind to Jane, so Dulp could only come to the conclusion that this was all Jane was going to get in the way of gob attention, so she was just going to have to live with this choice or live the rest of her life being childless…but good Gob were their offspring going to be ugly!
“Okay, I guess,” shrugged Dulp. “She can’t do worse…For what it’s worth, I really do feel sorry for her. I mean, my other half is a psycho, but she’s the best-looking psycho in the village, so there’s that.”
Skippy’s Field Notes #59:
The goblin racism toward my kind is astounding, if only because they believe halflings to be incredibly ugly. They don’t seem to care about my kind otherwise.
With that little observation aside, I can honestly say that Plain Jane is the #1 hottest bogo in the village, like ultra-ultra hot.
Uhhh…this is from a strictly scientific-research point of view. Jane has the ideal female body for any male, including breast-size-to-hips-ratio. She is stunningly gorgeous in the face, she has the classic short and curly hair of a halfling, she has a very-light off-olive color to her skin (what I could see through the mud anyway), and her eyes are a rare amber color, shooting her straight up off the charts in attractiveness.
Now, my heart belongs to Jenny, but Jane is woody-in-the-morning hot! I, of course, would never tell this to Jenny, because…well…she is my number-one squeeze, and she deserves all my love.
It’s just that…I think Jane deserves love too, so I’m going to set her up with some. Her best years are being whiled away by loneliness and a distinct lack of…well…male attention.
Speaking of male attention, Jenny and I have been…errr…“experimenting” lately in the “heavy petting” research department, and I must say, I have been skirting the wrath of Codblockus on this one!
I reeeeaaaally need to get Jenny to make me an “official gob” through some kind of spell. My little soldier wants to march!
S.P.W.
“Great!” grinned Skippy. “It’s settled then. Let’s go.”
“Wait…No it isn’t!” protested Dulp. “Why do I have to go! Why don’t you just go?…I don’t have to go.”
“Because you’re my best friend,” said Skippy in slight visible confusion.
“Whoa, wait, what?” asked Dulp. “You and I are…best friends?”
Dulp thought about this. It was true he’d gotten along with Skippy for the most part, but the truth was he’d just met the ugly little gob not that long ago, and the Chief had forced them together at that.
Burto was his actual best friend, but then again, Burto had never actively tried to help him with…well…anything, and Skippy was indeed a helper, and that was really odd. He didn’t know too many gobs who were helpers, if any. Heckens, Skippy had gotten him into more trouble than Dulp had seen in years, but things had always worked out for the better, so maybe there was something to this…
“I…guess…” said Dulp slowly.
“There’s no guess, Dulp, my gob!” grinned Skippy. “Come on! Let’s go have some fun in the South Quarter today!”
Who in the Heckens had fun in the South Quarter?
“Skippy, are you sure you didn’t hit your head?” asked Dulp.
“Come on, get off your bum and let’s go,” waved on Skippy. “Jenny’s waiting outside for us, and with her beside us, no one is going to harass you.”
Well, that was true. With Lyga and Xenon being taken down about five pegs, Jenny had officially ordained herself as the baddest bogo in Pingo. Skippy, of course, was the baddest gob in Pingo, so with the both of him by his side, the South Quarter was a cakewalk. No one was going to mess with him with those two guarding his backside.
It had taken many years of fear to build up the kind of…well…fear that any sane gob held for the South Quarter, but Skippy was breaking all kinds of records in absolutely crushing that nonsense, so why not?
“Yeah, okay,” said Dulp with a slight smile. “Yeah, let’s go hang out in the South Quarter…I guess…”
Of course, that open statement made him balk.
“I never thought I’d ever say that,” he said in a strange tone. “This is weird.”
“Oh, it’s not bad,” said Skippy with a nod and a smile. “You just have to have a stalwart will and a steadfast hand with the bogos and listen to them once in a while.”
Listen to a bogo? What the…?
“Skippy, you are definitely cut from a different cloth,” frowned Dulp. “Where do you get these ideas from? You’re so…ugh…upbeat all the time. You remind me of Jane…”
Skippy’s weird blue eyes flitted back and forth in more thought, he gasped, and then a huge grin split his face.
“That’s because…that’s because…uhhh…How do I say this?” he asked.
“Say what?” asked Dulp.
“Ummm…I have a confession to make,” nodded Skippy.
“Really?” asked Dulp. “What confession? What are you talking about?”
“Do you know what a halfling is?” asked Skippy.
“Ugh…Of course,” said Dulp with a roll of his eyes. “They’re those ugly, ugly little humans that hang around the big humans. In fact, Jane is plain because she’s a plainer. She’s half one of those things, because her father was one of those things, but I don’t see how any bogo in her right mind would make-a-do with one of those ugly little bastages…Wait…What am I saying? No bogo has a right mind.”
“Well…I am…also…a ‘plainer,’” said Skippy matter-of-factly, but in a drawn-out way.
Dulp felt as if a bolt of lightning struck him right through the middle of his bald head. He hopped up off his blanket and snapped the fingers of his right hand.
“IIIIIIIIIII knew it!” he proclaimed. “I knew there was something different about you!”
He shook his head and chuckled at his own stupidity.
“No wonder you’re so ugly!” he said with a short grin. “I should have known! I just thought the Great Gob had cursed you with all this ugliness because you’re so awesome at everything else that he had to balance you out!…Good Gob, that’s what the girls meant when they hinted at you not being a gob…Huh…I really am clueless.”
Skippy simply stood there with a look of sheer surprise and shock on his ugly face.
“Wait…You…think…I’m awesome?” asked Skippy.
“Oh, yeah,” nodded Dulp. “You’re the G.O.A.T., Skippy, the ‘Gobbiest of All Time.’”
“Faaaaaantastic!” grinned Skippy. “With that little confession out of the way, let’s get going!”
“Yeah, all right,” shrugged Dulp.
There were worse things out there than showing off that he was now “untouchable” in the South Quarter. How that was going to go over with the bogos?…Who knew, but he did know one thing for sure, and that was…No, wait, he really didn’t know how this was going to work out. Actually, he had no idea how this was going to go down.
*****
Dulp bent over and clutched his patchwork breeches. He was in the library, and he was currently trying not to puke. Being teleported by Jenny was becoming a nasty habit anymore, and it was starting to get to him, especially the spitting him out of the portal part.
Plain Jane looked up from behind her librarian’s desk and lowered the weird little glass plates over her eyes, those strange things humans called “glasses.” Today, she was wearing a simple long-sleeved dress with a white top and a brown skirt, but this simple wear added to the overall effect of looking like a “librarian,” which, in turn, added to the overall effect of her just being Gobawful ugly.
“Dulp!” she said with strange enthusiasm. “What are you doing here!…Wait!…Oh, my goodness! Did you come to get me to put me up on the X? I told you, as much as I’d love it, I can’t risk angering Lyga…”
The ugly bogo gasped as her eyes went wide, but Dulp had no idea what that action meant.
“That’s what this is about!” she squealed out in excitement. “Lyga’s punishment must have separated you two!…Oh, Holy Mother Bogo! You’ve come to get me on the side, haven’t you! Oh, no! I’m the other bogo!…Lyga’s going to butcher my bogo parts!”
“There’s not…” said Dulp as he shook his head and stood up. “There…There’s not…”
“Take your time,” grinned Plain Jane as she nodded in excitement. “Confess your love to me when you’re ready…”
“There’s not…” continued Dulp as he shook his head in reply. “There’s not…enough…hooch in the world, Jane; no way.”
“Oh, Dulp!” scowled Jane. “Stop being so mean!…Wait?…Are you playing hard to get?”
He had an answer ready, but they were both interrupted by the sudden appearance of both Skippy and Jenny, both of whom stepped out of their respective shadow portals to enter the center of the library right next to Dulp.
“Oh, Skippy!” squealed Jane in strange excitement. “Oh, you came to see me too! Is this some kind of battle over me between you and Dulp for my attention!…Oh, I feel…Oh, I don’t know how I…Wait…Oh…Hello, Jenny.”
Jane scowled and put a rather nasty and unhappy emphasis upon Jenny’s name, and Jenny’s eyebrows raised in concern over Jane’s clear hostility.
“Jane?” asked the bogo witch. “What’s with the attitude?”
“Thanks to you, I’m bruised now,” frowned Jane. “I am absolutely purple.”
“Thanks to me?” asked Jenny. “Why are you bruised?…Wait, you don’t look bruised…”
“Last night, you ’ported me right over Xenon while she was taking a bath,” grimaced Jane.
The look on her ugly face bespoke some sort of terrible horror that must have occurred, and Dulp, in spite of himself, wanted to hear how this unhappy little situation had turned out.
“Xenon threw me out of her bath,” frowned Jane. “She threw me out of her bath…by my nipples.”
Ooooooooooo. That had to hurt.
Dulp winced at that terrible image, as did Skippy, and even Jenny, terrifying as she was, winced as well.
“Oh, Jane…” grimaced Jenny.
“My boobies were just hanging out there, you know,” explained Jane. “It was on account of me being naked and all, so Xenon gave me the worst, the absolute worst, titty twister I’ve ever had. Oh, I thought my nips were going to tear right off. Oh, I screamed, and I almost never do that. Now my nipples are purple, not pink like they’re supposed to be.”
“Oh, I’m sorry, Jane,” said Jenny with a shake of her head. “That sounds…awful…It’s just…Skippy is my gob. You know that.”
Jane’s attitude turned on a silver ser.
“Well, Dulp here, wants me to be his girl,” grinned Jane. “He’s come here today to put me up on Lyga’s X! Of course, Lyga’s going to cut off all my bogo parts and make them into art pieces, but you take the bad with the good.”
This bogo was insane, just Plain Jane insane, and Dulp should have known, because, Heckens, the insanity was right there in her name.
“No, no, no,” said Dulp with a shake of his head as he waved his hands in front of him, palms out. “No, no, I came here with Skippy. With Skippy. Skippy has something to show you…He thinks he can set you up with another gob.”
Jane’s eyes lit up as her grin dropped wide open. She looked upon Skippy with such joy and happiness that she was…to Dulp anyway, maybe not to any other gob…but to Dulp anyway… for a brief second, she was almost…pretty.
“Skippy!” squealed out Jane. “Is that true!”
“Ab…so…lutely!” grinned Skippy in almost as much enthusiasm as Jane.
Now that he was staring at the both of them while they were both in the same room, Dulp could definitely see the inherited ugliness of the plainer in them…though, to be fair, Skippy’s condition was definitely worse than Jane’s, as Skippy looked to be even further removed from the typical gob than Jane looked from the typical bogo, but eh, Skippy was a White Skulls, so at least he had street cred to back him up. Jane, on the other hand, was just ugly without an anchor.
Whatever the case, Jane took this news with unbridled joy. She jumped up and down and squealed in excitement, her weird “glasses” bobbing up and down on her little round nose.
Skippy, to his credit, hopped up and down with her, and he looked just as excited as she did.
Eh, what the hey, right? Dulp smiled in spite of himself, because Jane had been alone for a long time, so seeing that wrong righted was kind of satisfying, you know?
What in the Heckens was he thinking! All bogos were insane predators of the night!
He smacked himself in the face and ran his palm down it. He needed to get his mind back on track. Skippy’s influence was slowly driving him bonkers.
Skippy proudly unfolded his sketch of his cousin, “Happinus,” proudly showed it off to Jane, and then proudly stood by with a look of prideful beaming pride as Jane ogled that proud charcoal sketch…proudly.
“Oh, he is so cuuuuuuute!” squealed Jane. “Oh, I can see a resemblance here, Skippy. Is he your brother?”
“Close,” nodded Skippy. “He’s my cousin, Happinus…‘Happy,’ for short.”
“Oh, he can make me happy any day…Mrrrowwrrr!” purred out Jane.
Dulp rolled his eyes. How anyone could be so up-in-their-cups over a “partner” was beyond him. His own was bad enough, and he had four daughters with that gorgeous psycho.
“Now, Jane,” nodded Jenny as she stepped forward. “Skippy wants to make a sketch of you so I can ’port it over to his cousin, okay?”
“Oooo, okay,” nodded Jane in return. “Do you want me to strip here, or should we go to your hutch?”
“Strip?” asked Jenny in confusion. “Wait, what do you mean ‘strip’?”
“Oh, we can do it here!” grinned Skippy.
“Skippy!” warned Jenny. “What are you—”
“I’m just kidding, Jenny,” said Skippy in a playful tone. “Unless, you don’t mind…”
“Of course, I mind!” said Jenny in very-audible umbrage.
“Jenny, my poppet, you know I’m only teasing,” grinned Skippy. “No, you’re the only one I want to sketch in the nude. We can do that later at your hutch.”
“Good,” nodded Jenny. “I’d better be the only one you want to…Wait…Wait a minute…”
“Anyway, I’m going to make a charcoal sketch of you now, Jane, so just pose for me,” nodded Skippy. “Lean over the desk here and smile…Oh, and take off your glasses for me.”
“Oh, these are for reading,” said Jane matter-of-factly. “I don’t have a lot to do here during the day except read the books and scrolls the gobs…uhhh…acquire.”
“Gotcha,” nodded Skippy.
He slung off his backpack, opened it up, and pulled forth his full sketchpad and charcoals.
“We’ll just get to work here, and then Jenny and I will head over to her hutch for her sketch,” his said nonchalantly.
“Now hold on a sec—” said Jenny in a strange tone.
“Oh, don’t worry, Jenny,” replied Skippy. “I will absolutely get you in your best light. You are, after all, the most gorgeous thing I’ve ever laid eyes upon. A full nude of you will be absolutely stunning, just breathtaking.”
Jenny turned a slight shade of red and gave a shy smile.
“Thank you, so much, Skippy!” she said happily. “That is so swee…Wait…What am I saying? Hang on a second…”
“Be right with you,” said Skippy as he took to drawing a beaming Jane.
Dulp wanted no part of this. A full nude sketch of Jenny? Great Gob Almighty! A gob might as well carry around a gorgon’s head in a bag.
Skippy’s Field Notes #60:
So, I got a really good sketch of Jane, I contacted Happy via the Communications Extraction Language Line Crystal (technically a telephonics crystal, but because it’s enchanted with a translator, it’s now a C.E.L.L. telephonics crystal, or C.E.L.L. “phone” for short). Jenny ’ported Jane’s sketch to Happy, and then Jane and Happy got to talking.
Happy was overjoyed with Jane’s picture, and I knew he would be. He’s from the Blackberry side of my family (on my Aunt Merta’s side), so his family are the bankers in Poppy Seed, unlike the Willowfluffs, who are, by trade, brewers of fine spirits.
Yes, Happy’s been quite lonely lately, as my Aunt Merta has him thoroughly steeped in the family trade of accounting, spending, and lending, and Happy, being a strapping young lad like myself, has wanted a wife for some time.
He knows, of course, that Plain Jane is half-goblin, and he was very wary of making her acquaintance, but after seeing her sketch, he has changed his mind twice over. He’s actually eager to see who I’M dating, because he’s convinced that I handed him the “plainer” one, thinking my girl must be really, really hot.
He’s right, of course; Jenny is suuuuuper hot, especially naked, which is why I’m going to weasel…errr…convince her to pose in the buff for me today. It’s past time for a proper nude of her anyway.
Regardless of all that, Jane and Happy hit it off, and now Jenny has them scheduled to meet at a rendezvous point outside of Poppy Seed. Poppy Seed is the absolute farthest Jenny can teleport anything, including people, and it’s a strain on her, but Jane is her friend, so she’s going to do it for her.
Happy knows full well it’s going to take a bit of persuasion to get his parents to accept Jane, but by the Great Gob is Jane gorgeous, bubbly, upbeat, and just a prize in general, so this shouldn’t be too much trouble. Also, Jane is a librarian, so she does have a trade that my Aunt Merta (mainly Aunt Merta, not Uncle Pinsley) will approve of.
Thankfully, Jane knows how to speak (and read) human, albeit with a goblin accent, and all halflings speak a differing halfling dialect of human based on regional location, so there wasn’t really much need for the translator enchantment in the C.E.L.L. phone, but it still helped convey—I think anyway—the sheer excitement of these two young romantics meeting for the first time.
Isn’t this just like a dream!
Saint Skippy is racking up some heavenly points! Maybe I can get in good with Bustina, goddess of buxom beauties!
One can dare to dream.
S.P.W.
*****
“Well, that worked out well,” smiled Skippy as he walked with both Dulp and Jenny across the South Quarter Square.
Eh, Jane was as happy as a clam, so Dulp felt a small spark of happiness in himself over the matter. True, he had no knowledge of what a clam was, but it seemed to fit the situation, and this was a human expression anyway, not a gob one, so whatever.
“Eh, ugly plainers will make more ugly plainers, but whatever,” shrugged Dulp. “Jane is happy, so I guess it’s all right.”
“Of course, it is,” frowned Jenny. “Jane can’t help the way she looks, Dulp.”
“I don’t think she’s ugly at all,” said Skippy in audible confusion. “Do you think she’s ugly, Jenny?”
“No,” said Jenny thoughtfully. “No, she’s very pretty, but you know how the gobs are.”
Dulp shook his head and rolled his eyes. The only thing “pretty” about Jane was her bare backside.
“Well, my cousin, Happy, is certainly eager to meet her,” smiled Skippy. “He’s on cloud nine right now.”
“Speaking of cloud nine, I’d like to get back to my Rote Neun,” said Dulp. “I have an appointment with a bottle, so excuse me, but if all of this romantic stuff with Jane is concluded, I’m heading back to my hutch.”
Jenny turned toward him and looked as if she were about to say something, but she was interrupted by a well-known bogo walking up to them, a bogo Dulp had not expected to see any time soon.
“Dulp,” said Hippolyga in a tired voice.
If Dulp had possessed any hair, it would’ve turned white. He truly had not expected his other half to show up in the square. He’d honestly figured her bum had only gone down a little in tenderness, only from a full ripe strawberry to a bright pink over the course of one night, morning, and afternoon.
Lyga was dressed in a long-sleeved beige top and a forest-green skirt, probably something she’d just thrown together at the last second to get up and out of her hutch. Her eyes held some dark patches beneath them, a leftover of lack of sleep. Considering how tender her bum had to be, Dulp actually felt some sympathy for her. He’d also spent a few sleepless nights agonizing over a strawberry bum.
She was still dangerous, though. He was going to have to be wary about his walnuts around her.
“Lyga,” said Dulp in wary reply.
Lyga walked up to their little group and sighed. She deliberately ignored both Skippy and Jenny as she addressed Dulp directly.
“I didn’t expect to see you in the South Quarter,” said Lyga.
Dulp decided to just answer her directly without any dissemination. There was no reason not to.
“I was helping Skippy set up a…a ‘date’ for Plain Jane,” replied Skippy. “He set up Jane with a meet-and-greet with his cousin, Happy. Happy’s a plainer too, just like Skippy, so Jane and Skippy’s cousin hit it off right away. They’ve been communicating with a magic crystal Old Matron Bogo gave Jenny. I guess they really like each other.”
“Oh,” said Lyga in a downcast tone. “Jane is lucky, then. I wish we could do more meet-and-greets here in Pingo. We only get to see the gobs during Rush Time, and that’s only once a year, maybe twice if we’re lucky. I…I would like a meet-and-greet every once in a while. That would be nice.”
“That would be nice,” interrupted Jenny.
Both Dulp and his insane other half turned to give their full attention to the only witch in Pingo.
“Skippy and I have meet-and-greets…err…‘dates’…all the time,” continued Jenny. “Dulp, why don’t you escort Lyga back to her hutch. She doesn’t look like she’s feeling all that well. Maybe you can spend some time with her for a while, sometime ‘outside’ of Rush Time. You could help her out around her hutch for a little bit. She’s looking a little down right now.”
The idea of this nearly broke Dulp’s brain. Who in the Heckens spent time with a bogo outside of Rush Time…? Well, other than Skippy, but Skippy was a whole other animal.
Dulp raised his right hand and pointed his right index finger in the air. He was fully intent on protesting against this completely insane and thoroughly anti-gob notion, but then he turned and saw Lyga’s beautiful face. There was a slight glimmer in her dark eyes, one that radiated…hope? Eagerness?…Whatever it was, it was something he had never once noticed before in her eyes when it came to him.
This was just odd. He’d had no idea that Lyga could actually wish for his help, that the psychotic bogo would actually want or even need his help.
His answer was automatic after that, and that answer shocked him right down to his bones. He couldn’t help himself, because he felt something new growing inside him.
He stepped forward, put his right arm around Lyga’s waist, and pointed himself and her in the direction of her hutch.
“Come on,” he said gently. “Let’s get you back home. You shouldn’t be up and about right now anyway.”
Lyga held a slight smile on her lips, though she tried to hide it, but he noticed it, and Gobdarned if that didn’t get to him.
Whatever this was, whatever was going on, all Dulp knew was…that…well…things in the village were changing, and changing into what, only the Great Gob knew.
Goblins in the Mist: Chapter Fifteen Copyright © 2025 bloodytwine.com Matthew L. Marlott
Author’s Note: The picture for this story was created via artificial intelligence courtesy of Canva.com.